meditation – The Leadership Professor

Researchers at the Mayo Clinic have found that regularly practicing a phenomenon they call "loving kindness” can profoundly change your attitude, outlook, and health[1].

Even better, regular practice rewires the brain to be more present and kinder to yourself and others, giving your focus and mood an added daily boost.

Here are three simple practices to get you started.

1. Loving-kindness meditation (LKM)

LKM is a quiet, solo reflective practice that focuses thought on the heart region and encourages warm, tender thoughts about a loved one or cherished others. In one study, one hour of LKM a week led people to report greater positive emotions – love, contentment, joy, satisfaction – during their social exchanges with others.

The researchers also documented health benefits from regular practice of LKM that include:

Reduced pain and tension from migraines
Reduced symptoms of depression
Possibly slowing the aging process. Studies have found that women who practice LKM have longer telomeres, which are like little end-caps on your DNA. Shorter telomeres have been associated with faster aging.

Even small periods of practice can help. One study found a 10-minute session of LKM increased feelings of social connection and positive feelings toward others.

2. Acts of kindness

This one is exactly what you’d imagine. Intentionally set a goal to be kinder to others.

Strategies can be as simple as doing something nice or unexpected for a loved one or even a stranger. Hold a door open for the person behind you. Offer a warm greeting or smile when unexpected. Make a special effort to extend kind words to someone. Send a friend or family member a simple text or email message – or forward an article you think they might enjoy – to tell them you are thinking about them. Take a few extra minutes to help or listen more closely to another.

Regular acts of kindness make you feel good – and beget more kindness.

Neuroscientists have confirmed that thinking or acting kindly toward others activates the part of your brain that makes you feel pleasure. It also releases the hormone oxytocin that increases interpersonal bonding and feelings of enjoyment from social interactions — the higher your oxytocin levels, the kinder and more generous you may become.

3. Gratitude

Everyone has something good in life for which to feel grateful. What’s on your list? If the answer does not come easy, it’s time to start building your list, literally. One way to increase feelings of gratitude is to write them down in a hand-written or virtual journal.

Researchers have found that feeling thankful for life’s little blessings can improve sleep, diminish fatigue, increase confidence, and even lessen depression.

And keeping some form of a gratitude journal — writing down happy moments, beautiful observations, or people or things you’re grateful for in your life — has been found to improve biological markers of heart health.

Like any other skill set, expressing kindness and gratitude gets easier with practice – and the benefits multiply. Start slow and simple with activities such as

Spend a few minutes each day thinking positive thoughts about the important people in your life.

Reflect on your week and write down a few things you’re most grateful for. Why not keep some slips of paper and a gratitude jar on your bedside table: end your day by writing down one special something from your day and putting it into the jar. You’ll drift off to sleep with positive feelings about a special someone or something – and have a wealth of reminders for those times when you feel down or alone.
Set aside 10 minutes to sit quietly, meditate, or simply think warm tender feelings about a loved one that comes straight from your heart.

The world – and your relationships – will be better for your efforts. And you just might become a happier and healthier you.

[1] HOUSECALL, Vol. 19, Issue 24, March 22, 2018. Accessed online March 22, 2018 at https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/how-sharing-kindness-can-make-you-healthier-happier/art-20390060/?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=housecall

Research, published in the new book The Emotional Life of your Brain by Richard J. Davidson (with Sharon Begley), has good news. We can change our emotional styles and become more self-aware, attentive to context, and resilient – core skills for surviving and thriving in the rough-and-tumble leadership world. All it takes is systematic mental practice.

I’ll let you read the neurophysiology and brain science and just cut to the chase here. By thinking – and thinking alone – adults can expand areas of the brain to broaden their cognitive and emotional capacities.

This gives us more control than previously believed over what Davidson and Begley call the Six Key Elements of Emotional Style: our resilience in the face of disappointment, outlook on life, self-awareness, social intuition, attention, and sensitivity to context.

To quote the authors: “Mental activity, ranging from meditation to cognitive-behavior therapy, can help you develop a broader awareness of social signals, a deeper sensitivity to your own feelings and bodily sensations, a more consistently positive outlook, and a great capacity for resilience.”

Too negative an outlook on life or situation? Embrace the essentials of “well-being therapy” and focus on ways you can be more grateful, generous, appreciative, and upbeat. You’ll have significant growth in the brain areas used, giving you quicker and more automatic access to these positive responses over time.

Not very self- or other-aware? Slow down and ask yourself to focus on the feelings, discomfort, or concerns of another. It’ll increase activation of the circuitry involved in taking in pain and distress more carefully and broaden your capacities to see life more richly and compassionately.

Too self-aware and filled with the internal chatter and self-evaluations that keep you spinning your wheels? Learn to observe your thoughts or feelings non-judgmentally and choose to put them aside.

Mindfulness and meditation help here. [See the blog archives for past posts of mindfulness and the work of Ellen Langer.] With practice, you’ll develop the hard-wiring and self-control needed to pause, acknowledge a setback or disappointment, have a good laugh at how quickly your mind wants to perseverate and magnify a mere bump in life’s road, and stop yourself from spiraling downward.

The authors claim that locating the base of emotions at least partly in the brain’s seat of reason is a major break from conventional wisdom in psychology and neuroscience.

I’m thrilled their work affirms human capacities to develop the emotional and cultural intelligence needed for effective leadership in an increasingly diverse world. How do you want to lead? Respond? Be? Make it happen. That’s hugely empowering – and productive for us all!